


The Lows and Highs...

by pherryt



Series: Bucky Barnes Bingo [8]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Ace!Bucky, Cuddling, Fluff, Lots of Cuddling, M/M, Some angst, Soulmarks, deaf!Clint, kite flying, lots of fluff, mute!bucky, playing with bucky's hair, tub sharing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-12 22:44:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20572154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pherryt/pseuds/pherryt
Summary: Bucky's adjusting to life in the tower and to being Clint's soulmate. He finds things a little easier when he realizes that he helps Clint as much as Clint helps him.





	The Lows and Highs...

**Author's Note:**

> written for the reverse prompt blogs prompt #4 Flying Kites  
written for the winterhawk bingo - Tub Sharing  
written for the bucky barnes bing - support group 
> 
> not beta'd cause the kid is bugging me to spend time with her... time to go be a mom

It was stupid. So freaking stupid. Despite knowing that he was upset over something incredibly small and dumb, Bucky couldn’t help the tears threatening him as he stomped back into the tower. He stabbed viciously at the buttons on the elevator then felt immediately guilty because JARVIS _was _the building, right? And JARVIS had been nothing but helpful since Steve had brought him back here, and here Bucky was, treating him like dirt.

Less than dirt. He was treating JARVIS the way HYDRA had treated Bucky – like a thing.

Which was also probably stupid because JARVIS _was_ just this thing that Stark had made up, right? Except that JARVIS _felt_ like an honest to god, real person to Bucky. He had personality. Intelligence was one thing, but the AI, as Stark referred to JARVIS when speaking in technical terms, had personality just _oozing_ out of him.

JARVIS treated _Bucky_ like a real person.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck. _

Now he felt extra crappy. How had the day gone downhill so fast?

It had started off well enough. Despite his nightmares, Bucky had a routine down. He woke up early, and he’d stare at his soulmark. His fingers touching the moving ink reverently. He still couldn’t believe that someone like him could _have _a soulmate. That it was someone as compassionate and understanding as Clint still boggled his mind. The fact that he wasn’t broken after all - not too broken to have a soulmate even after what HYDRA had done to him, had tried to make of him – was… Bucky didn’t even have words.

Not that he had many these days anyway.

After spending time watching his wolf curl up with Clint’s hawk, Bucky would eventually lever himself out of bed to travel down to the common area for some coffee. Sometimes Clint would be there too – nightmares were not a thing reserved only to Bucky, as it turned out – in his loose, ratty sweatpants, no hearing aids, a blanket wrapped around naked shoulders. And if he was, they’d work around each other in companionable silence, then sit together on the window seat filled with pillows, staring out over the city as lights twinkled off and the sun rose.

Some days were better than others, and either Bucky or Clint would wind up sitting with his back to the others chest, a head curling over a shoulder as they sipped at their coffee. No words were spoken. None were needed, both of them relaxing into a touch that demanded nothing more except the comfort it gave them both.

Eventually they’d finish their coffee, the mugs would be set to the side, on the floor and Clint would inevitably fall asleep – either in Bucky’s arms, which Bucky loved, loved the feeling of protecting the taller man – or slumping over so his face was buried in Bucky’s neck, or his hair, snoring softly, sometimes a little wetly.

And sometimes, one of the others would catch them there. Steve and Nat would smile happily at them as they came in, the smiles sappy sweet. Sam just nodded. Banner would collect their mugs and silently offer Bucky a fresh one if he wanted. He declined, but appreciated the offer. Stark’s reaction was unpredictable. It depended on how long he’d been up and how wired he’d gotten. But by far, Bucky’s favorite, was when Stark hadn’t known they were there and had been walking around in a haze, muttering to the air – which would look mad to anyone who didn’t know that JARVIS was attentively listening and probably taking down any notes Stark would want later.

Stark had flopped down into the window seat without checking and then screamed when it moved, falling on his ass on the floor.

Clint had looked adorably confused as he pouted, then patted Bucky’s chest and curled in tighter, falling back asleep while Stark spluttered incoherently until pepper came down in a robe and took him in hand, leading him away.

Sometimes, if Bucky was feeling up to it and Clint wasn’t being particularly octopus like, Bucky would join Steve and Sam on their runs. If he wasn’t, he’d go down to the gym instead, preferring to use it when no one else was likely to be there.

None of the other avengers were particularly early risers, really, but none of them slept _well_, so that was a thing. And somehow, it was a comforting thing. Because that meant that Bucky wasn’t the only one who’s life had fucked him over.

And that would make him feel guilty too, if he let himself dwell on it, so he tried not to dwell on it.

After that was a nice, hot shower. Or if he really needed it, a good, long soak in the tub. It felt decadent, almost too much after the austerity of a lifetime, but it was his one indulgence, besides touching Clint, or kissing him. but was it really an indulgence if it was something they both craved?

Bucky wasn’t sure.

So yeah, his morning had started off normal enough. Everything had gone like clockwork and he’d felt… good. He’d felt up to attempting to leave his self-imposed bubble and walk around the neighborhood some, like a regular person, to get reacquainted with New York whose skyline had changed from his childhood in Brooklynn to something so much_ fuller_ than he was used to.

Well, it hadn’t gone well.

Everything was too fast, too loud. Everyone walked too close, not caring if they bumped into you. a car had backfired, leaving Bucky slamming back into the side of a building a shaking mess as his eyes scouted for danger.

He couldn’t even go for a fucking walk.

Bucky slumped into his little apartment – though little was not a word he should be attributing to it, as it was bigger than anything he’d ever lived in – as soon as JARVIS opened the elevator doors. He beelined for the couch and dropped onto it, breathing way too hard, his head cradled in his hands.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat like that, shaking, before there was a knock on his door. His throat closed up and his fingers tightened painfully in his hair.

“Sir, if I may, it’s Agent Barton. He seems a little off kilter.” JARVIS spoke, his ‘voice’ pitched low, just for Bucky’s ears.

Bucky breathed in slowly, let it out, then breathed in again. Just the idea that Clint was there helped a little bit, the idea that Clint might need _him_ helped more. He nodded, unable to speak and the door slid open.

Clint stumbled in, tripped, righted himself, and then was beside Bucky in a heartbeat, collapsing onto the couch. Their shoulders knocked together and Bucky could feel a fine tremble coming off of Clint and his eased up a little more as his concern for Clint pulled him back even further.

Forcing his hands off his head, Bucky twisted to look at Clint but shifted his legs up to keep contact with Clint in some way, his knee nudging into Clint’s leg. He moved his hands carefully, brow furrowed as he worked to get the signs right.

‘Ok?’

Clint shrugged.

‘What’s wrong?’

Clint shrugged again, mouth turned down into a frown. “Nothing, really. Just… I feel… _off._” His hands curled into frustrated fists and his eyes looked too bright, a little wet, and Bucky had a flash of inspiration, an idea that not too long ago would have sent him into a panic.

‘Bath?’

There was silence as Clint stared at him. “Huh?”

‘You. Me. Share a hot bath? Always makes me feel better.’

“Share one?” Clint squeaked, his eyes going wide. “Bucky, are you sure?”

Bucky gave him a look. ‘Not doing anything, just sharing.’

“You don’t have to – “ Clint said, shaking his head. Bucky swallowed, reached for Clint, cupping his cheek in one hand and took a deep breath.

“Not just you. Me too.” Bucky shrugged, looked away, still struggling to get his words out. Even those few had felt like a herculean effort. He, who had once been so good with words.

“Babe?” Clint asked now, one hand coming up to cover Bucky’s. Bucky’s heart wrenched at the concern on Clint’s face, felt the tears prick his eyes once more and Clint leaned forward, tapping their heads together. “Okay. Let’s take a bath.”

They rose together, supporting each other with a wet laugh when Clint stumbled. JARVIS already had the water running, bubbles forming as the steam rose. They stripped together and then stepped into the tub, jostling each other as they silently tried to figure out how they would sit. Each of them, apparently, wanted to hold the other.

Clint won and Bucky laid back into Clint with a sigh, tension slowly draining out of his body as water continued to flow into the oversized tub, the white bubbles covering the surface of the water in huge, fluffy mounds.

They shifted a bit, Clint’s arms wrapping around Bucky’s middle and Bucky tucking his head into Clint’s neck. They stretched out their legs and Clint popped his foot out of the water all covered in foamy bubbles, wiggling his toes with a giggle. Bucky smiled too.

“One thing you gotta say about Tony, he spares no expense. And not like, the Jurassic park guy. But like, in the _good _way. The tower was the first time I ever fit into a _tub_ without some part of me sticking out of it. The first time the water didn’t drain away faster than it could fill, even with the stopper in. And that’s not even counting all the extra’s Tony’s equipped, like keeping the water heated and shit,” Clint said, his voice a soothing rumble against Bucky’s back.

The two of them sat there for some time, soaking in the water and the heat, the bubbles slowly fading away – but not before Bucky and Clint scooped some up and sculpted things on top of each other’s heads, laughing.

“Hey, check this out,” Clint said, as the last of the bubble bath finally dissipated. He took a washcloth and a bar of soap and ran the bar over the washcloth till it was nearly white on one side. Then he placed it over his mouth and blew through the washcloth, startling a laugh out of Bucky when a froth of bubbles erupted from the washcloth.

‘You’re ridiculous,’ Bucky signed at Clint but couldn’t tone down the grin. Clint waggled his eyebrows at Bucky, eliciting another burst of laughter from him.

With a hum, Clint soaped up the washcloth again, running it over Bucky’s arms - briefly chasing their marks as the wolf and the hawk bounced between them - chest and back, the touch just on the right side of enough and not too much. Bucky’s stomach twitched in, a tickled breath and Clint gave it a last swipe before handing him the cloth.

Bucky knew that Clint just meant for him to finish washing himself, was trying to not get too handsy for Bucky’s sake – they weren’t there quite yet. Might never be, though Clint had assured Bucky it was fine. But Bucky smiled, soaped the cloth for the third time and returned the favor, sliding it over Clint’s biceps and shoulders slowly, dragging it down his chest and over each scar, scars Clint seemed to wear unabashedly.

When he finished, a last swipe across the small of Clint’s back and going just as far as Clint had and no further, he dropped the cloth into the water, Clint’s chin propped over Bucky’s shoulder as he slumped forward. Clint started to shift and Bucky pressed one hand between Clint’s shoulders gently as the other reached for his shampoo.

He lathered up Clint’s hair and carded through it carefully, feeling Clint’s body turn boneless and Bucky grinned.

“You were right,” Clint slurred. “This feels amazing. Better than therapy. Better than sex.”

“Better than coffee?” Bucky asked, pulling away so Clint could read his lips. Clint whined when he moved but then shook his head vehemently.

“_Nothing_ is better than coffee.”

Bucky laughed. “So you say, sweetheart,” he whispered. It was easier to speak when Clint’s ears weren’t in, for some reason, but there was never any volume to it. Not that it mattered, because Clint couldn’t hear him, but maybe that was why? Hell if Bucky knew. Whatever the reason, Clint still beamed at Bucky though, his eyes tracking Bucky’s lips, never making a big deal of it.

It was just one of the many reasons Bucky loved his soulmate.

Eventually Clint had turned him around again, and it was Bucky’s turn to melt under Clint’s fingertips, the long fingers threading through Bucky’s long hair and scratching gently over his scalp. Bucky moaned, his head tilting into the touch and Clint chuckled.

“Don’t know why your mark’s a wolf when you’re just like a cat,” Clint said.

Sadly, they couldn’t stay in the hot bath forever, their skin turning pruney. Together they stood, the tub immediately draining away as they stepped out, reaching for the giant fluffy towels Bucky preferred. They were soft, and comforting. Clint seemed to agree if his blissful expression when Bucky helped him towel down was any indication.

They’d only just managed to get redressed and settled onto the couch when there was another knock at the door, JARVIS this time announcing Steve and Sam.

Feeling much more mellow and relaxed, Bucky nodded and JARVIS slid the door open, allowing them in. Steve, as usual, smiled indulgently at the sight of the two of them. Clint braided Bucky’s hair, his fingers never slowing, as Steve and Sam came closer.

Bucky frowned at the large diamonds in their hands. They were cloth, far too flimsy to be a shield or anything like that.

‘What is all that?’ he asked.

Steve, luckily, had been learning sign as soon as he’d realized how hard of a time Bucky had been having speaking and he’d been an even faster learner than Bucky had.

“Sam and I are going up to the roof garden – he’s going to teach me how to fly a kite, since that was something I never did as a kid. Thought I’d ask if you wanted to join us,” Steve said. “Seeing as you’ve never flown a kite before either.”

Clint patted Bucky’s shoulder. “All done.” Then he leaned over Bucky’s shoulder, hooking his chin on it and wrapping his hands around his middle just like he had earlier in the bath. “And that sounds awesome – but Sam’s gonna have to teach all of us, cause I’ve never done it either.”

Before Bucky knew it, the four of them had increased by another three – Tony, Nat and Bruce having somehow found out about the little excursion. Stark was challenging anyone and everyone to see who could get their kite the highest as Sam struggled to work around him and show everyone else how to get a kite into the air.

And then proceeded to sulk when a super soldier and two snipers picked up the underlying physics of it super damn quick.

Nat deigned to actually participate, laying down in one of the lawn chairs, a floppy brimmed had and a pair of sunglasses making it impossible to tell if she was watching them all act like fools, or if she’d fallen asleep. Bruce had pulled out a grill just as the doors opened and Pepper and Rhodey had joined them, each of them carrying supplies for dinner.

“Nice job, everyone,” Pepper said, as watched three kites swooping in and around each other. Sam and Steve were flying one together, Starks was doing tricks and Clint and Bucky were just happy they got theirs into the sky.

The impromptu dinner party and kite flying lasted well after sunset, breaking briefly for dinner, then for s’mores – another tradition that neither Steve nor Bucky had ever participated in. Sunset was beautiful giving way to stars, the tower high enough that they could actually be seen despite the glow of the city around them. Stark declared himself winner, but nobody really cared.

Clint and Bucky sat on top of one of the garden fixtures – a terraced piece of land sculpted to look like a cliff (because as Clint said, Stark spared no expense, like, ever) – huddled together as the temperature dropped, their bright red kite the only one left in the sky.

Today had been one of those days, for Bucky, a day that reassured him that he _could _make a life for himself after HYDRA. It had started simple enough, then had spiraled down faster than he could have imagined, and yet… he wasn’t alone anymore. He had people, friends… _family _that cared for him, supported him – and he supported them right back. He leaned his head on Clint’s shoulder.

They’d both had a low moment today, minor but still… _in _that moment, it hadn’t felt minor and it would have been so easy to fall further down into the yawning pit but together they’d pulled themselves up and started climbing out, and without even knowing, the team and pulled them the rest of the way.

Bucky knew there would be worse moments to come for both of them, but this moment, right now, was just about as perfect as it could get.

He was positive it made everything else worth it.

  


**Author's Note:**

> [ Reverse Prompt blog ](https://reverseprompts.tumblr.com/)  
also, i made this to go with the series  
[ Clint teaches Bucky sign language](https://dragonpressgraphics.tumblr.com/post/187409460052/winterhawk-sign-language-so-my-poor-attempt-at) a one page comic


End file.
